BEWARE YOUR HUMAN

if you remember, i recently posted an entry about the evils of catnip. well, it appears there is another danger to beware of. no matter how much you think your human loves you, watch them closely. there is no end to what they are capable of.

a case in point: i got a call from a canine friend of mine who lives in the same house with one of my best feline friends. it appears that the humans who live in the same house are not to be trusted. my canine friend was able to get the latest atrocity caught on a digital camera. i would not have believed it had i not seen it myself. it seems that the male human is too lazy to do things for himself, and doesn't have the gonads to ask the wife to do them. so what does he do? he stoops to tricking the furry ones in the house to doing them for him. he told my friend there was a juicy mouse in the toe....



below are pictures to prove what the poor feline (i will leave their names out of this, so as not to embarrass them) had to do for their male human. now, my friend is recovering nicely, but DON'T LET THIS HAPPEN TO YOU!!



my feline friend being made to check her male human's shoes to see if they stink...........

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NETWORK MASCOT

i always knew i was a star, now it has been proven. my human joined this poetry/prose network and of course as soon as i got in there, i won everyone's heart. out of the blue the founder of the network emailed my human and told her she wanted to make me, Coatie, the group mascot. at first all i could think about were those stupid humans dressed up like critters of all kinds at those things they call sporting events. heck no, i didn't want to be a mascot. but then miss hannah, the founder, told me that it wasn't like that at all. i could have my own space for talking about things of importance to me, other critters, and even those pesky humans. so, my human asked me if i would agree, and i said i would if they used a flattering picture of me. so, i am now officially the NOSTALGIARAMBLINGS.COM mascot. i have my beautiful photo on the sidebar of the main page, and i have my own blog, my own discussion forum, plus numerous other options to pursue. i also have the run of the "attic" (where there are mice, frogs and other small prey, i mean critters) as well as the "cellar" (who knows what might lurk down there? i know there are lots of spiders, for i am constantly running into their webs)

i had started to think that i was too old to be a star again. but i guess not. when you are as pretty and smart as i am, anything is possible.

i guess this is where i have to thank my human, regina, for joining the network in the first place.

SO THANKS, REGINA!

CATNIP.......THE DRUG OF CHOICE

i have been truly concerned about a friend of mine recently. he is very young and is falling in with the wrong crowd already. we used to be close, but i started noticing his behavior had changed and he hadn't been around much lately. i heard news about him from other felines in the area, but hardly ever saw him anymore.

i got word the other day that poor little, um, i shall call him "D. H." to keep his identity a secret, had hit an all time low and was finally convinced by his family to enter rehab. i was so saddened to hear that D. H. had come to this point, but was glad someone convinced him to get help.

so, listen up, felines and their humans, don't let this happen in your circle of friends or family. if you see a feline going down, crashing hard, get him/her help. keep the catnip out of their reach so they won't have to go through what D. H. is going through.

i wanted to thank possum s. hemmingway for pointing out early on the evils of catnip. i should have listened closer and noticed the signs in D. H.'s life. maybe i could have gotten to him before he HAD to enter rehab.

I HAVE BEEN SPOTLIGHTED, OR IS THAT SPOTLIT??

i'm not sure what all the hooplah is about, but my human, regina, is like bouncing off the walls and yelling and screaming something about "my baby is famous, my baby girl has notoriety, she has exposure, she is A STAR!!!" of course, i have no idea what she is talking about, as i have ALWAYS been a STAR!!

it was then i noticed she had opened my online friend's blog (possum of http://pshemmingway.blogspot.com/) and found out that i was one of the featured pets of the week. now, i don't quite understand that, since regina is MY PET. and there is no picture of her on there anywhere. either way, i HAVE become famous, and, though already a STAR, i have now gained notoriety. i would like to thank my friend possum for thinking so highly of me as to put me into his blog. and i also appreciate being considered possum's "SENTIMENTAL FAVORITE".

BUT...................i have to take issue with my ranking in sequence. my spotlight is preceded by 2 other felines, 3 canines, and embarrassingly enough, a jackarse. can you believe it???? a four legged backside. sheeeeeesh, possum. what were you thinking, hon???

anyway, be that as it may, i am still honored to be among possum's friends, and to be featured on his blog. oh, and possum, um, i am a FEMALE, not male, as you so erroneously listed me on your blog.................but i forgive you..........THIS TIME!

here is the posting on possum's blog:

My sentimental favorite of today's pics was sent to me by Regina who is the pet of Coatie. I normally rely on my exceptional wit to enhance my journal posts, but the email I received from Regina far exceeds what I could have written in it's stead. Here's Regina's note:

This is my 7 year old female cat, Coatie, who is part Russian Blue and part traveling salesman. she is a foundling, found when she was around 3 months old. I am her human, and my name is Regina. We both reside in the wonderful city of McDonough in the more wonderful southern state of Georgia. During the winter months, she sleeps on a heating pad while i hide under loads of cover in an unheated room. She is the princess of all princesses

Regina says Coatie is yawning in this pic, but being a cat myself (and a handsome one at that) I believe Coatie is just preparing for his morning meows which sends human pets scurrying around the house looking for food and other items that might please us. Please stop by and visit Coatie and Regina who pens the journal "A Page Unturned" You can visit her by clicking the link below.

http://apageunturned.blogspot.com/

please come back again sometime, and sit and visit with me. we will share some catnip and tuna, or maybe even salmon.

I TOLD HER I WAS SORRY

my human bears a beautiful set of teeth marks on her left pinky.......thanks to me. i mean, heck, it wasn't my fault. really it wasn't. you see, i let her sleep next to me on the bed. she thinks that laying her hand on my belly while i am sleeping makes me feel more secure. i just let her do it, knowing it really makes HER more secure.

well sometime in our sleep the other night, i was having this horrible nightmare. while dreaming of a huge set of canines coming down on my neck, i attacked what i thought was the dog's paw. it turned out to be my human's left pinky. we both jumped up out of the bed and after my human turned on the light and assessed the damage, she looked at me like i had lost my mind. of course, i was sorry i had mistaken her poor pinky for a dog paw, but one cannot help what happens in ones dreams......or nightmares. the marks are still there, even after several days of healing. but she shows off her wound to people at work as if it is a badge of honor and courage. i let her think that.........as long as i get what i want, she can believe whatever she wants.

i got a few new toys the other day and so far my favorite is the knit catnip mouse with the leather ears and tail. i carry it proudly around the house like it was something i actually caught. it impresses the human, so i am ok with it.

i have the strangest feeling that something is going on outside my window. my human caught me trying to sneak a look out that window and yelled at me. i am not supposed to be seen in that front window, as it faces the street and someone might see me. something about i am not supposed to be here.........anywhooooo........i keep hearing pawsteps outside the window, as well as screaming and meowing and all kinds of a fuss. i caught a glimpse of 2 black furry things and think they might be akin to me. of course, they don't have the same fantastic looks that i have, so i am sure they are a lesser species.

well, gotta go. the human is pushing me out of the clawed up computer chair. guess she wants to use this contraption now. i will never get in bed if she gets on here.

DO WHAT WITH MY WHAT?????

ok, i have to draw the line here..............

i was looking at the kitty news on aol and the following article popped up. i was blown away when i read this. no one, i mean no one, is going to touch my precious blue-gray fur while i am alive or even after i have gone to the rainbow bridge. keepa da paws off my fur!!!

ARTICLE:

Love your cat a lot (maybe too much)?

Want to have a little piece of your kitty with you even after she's gone?

Then have cat groomer Danelle German make a handbag out of your cat's fur.

Danelle takes the extra hair she shaves off of her Persian cat clients and spins it into yarn. She then knits the furry skeins into kitten-soft purses and sweaters.

A great way to keep your beloved pet close to your heart, or totally gross?

You decide.

MY FRIEND, GRAY

this is my outside feline friend, gray. she isn't allowed to come in and play with me, nor am i allowed to go out and play with her. but we have exchanged meows at the back door a few times. my human seems to like her better than most of the outside felines. i have to admit, she is rather a pretty miss.